Waiting

Waiting for an unknown date is so bizarre.  Things in Ethiopia have been changing  a lot lately which leaves us with no idea how long the wait will last.  When people ask about when we think we will get our little girl they look at me strange when I say I have no idea.  I'm always probed for "a general timeline" but that doesn't exist at this point.  Believe me, I want to know more than anyone what our timeline will be but I suppose this builds patience (or what manifests more like frustration most days).    I would love to know if our birth mother is pregnant yet, if our baby has been born, what the current situation is, etc. but that's all part of international adoption.  The answers to so many questions we won't know and many we will never get answers to.  The wait time averaged 8 months for quite some time but has now steadily climbed to 13 months and is expected to continue climbing.  Tuesday was our 2 month anniversary of being on "the list" but unfortunately since the wait time is climbing it feels like we never get any closer to the finish line of meeting our daughter.   I'll admit, I'm feeling defeated.